I wish I could just be happy. But I can’t be happy until I calm down. I can’t calm down. seriously, whether its excitement or anger or whatever I am always on edge. I’m either really happy and excited and annoying or I am moody and quiet and hate everyone. Apart from when I’m alone. Then I am mostly peaceful. But being on edge all the time, paranoid about whether I am being looked at or laughed at or talked about, leads to this. I get so angry, I can’t control myself, I take it out on those I love the most. Which makes me want to die. Honestly, I want to die when this happens.
I will probably delete this imminently.
